ZOMG, I'm The Father Of THREE Teenagers

This is a post from my Daddy Diaries column, featured at tesh.com.

Last weekend, my youngest son turned 13. That means that I am now the father of three teenage boys: a 13-year-old, a 15-year-old, and a 16-year-old. If you were hearing this, instead of reading it, there would be a dramatic music sound inserted right here, kind of like dum dum dummmmmmmmmm.

Now, before I forget, the picture that accompanies this post is not of my actual children. I have this thing about Web privacy, so these are models pretending to be my actual children. In my opinion, my actual children are much cuter than these models, although no less threatening. That being said, my three teenage boys have three different personalities and each comes with their own set of challenges.

I knew the day would come that I would be seen as a geezer and have older kids. I’m still trying to process watching them grow and become young adults because it seems like I held each them in just one hand only a few days ago.

The youngest son is an incredible movie fanatic – much like a very young, but just as feisty, Roger Ebert. His favorite part about turning 13 is that he’s now able to see a PG-13 movie on his own. I thought that he’d be all fired up to get his own Facebook page instead, but he's busy watching movies on his tablet, analyzing the composition of each and every shot as if he were Christopher Nolan.

The 15-year-old suffers from “middle child syndrome" at times, but is pretty well adjusted for the most part. He lives for music, plays five instruments, is an accomplished Boy Scout, all the while managing to be a total chick magnet. Each of those things provides unique challenges on their own, but roll it all together and it can be quite a ball of fire to deal with on a daily basis. He also seems to suffer some sort of video game fixation – notice I did not say the word addiction – and would probably spend every waking moment with a PlayStation remote in his hand, if he wasn't so busy doing all the other things in his life.

Then there is the oldest boy. He’s 16-years-old and a sophomore in high school. Seriously, when did my baby become a sophomore in high school? And now he’s old enough to drive? When did my bundle of joy become hairier than I am? Honestly, it's kind of freaking me out. When I think about how much all of my kids have grown and wonder how they got to be teenagers, it certainly has me thinking about how time flies.

The 13-year-old’s birthday was a pretty jarring moment in many ways. But just as I was becoming a little more comfortable with him becoming a teenager, I got a kick in the face when the mail came yesterday. My oldest son, who still has two-and-a-half years left in high school, received his first college recruiting letter yesterday. He scored highly on some standardized test. And since the testing company sold a list of high achievers to colleges, I'm guessing they are all going to start courting kids like him. I realized it’s actually a good thing. Since I'll have three in college at the same time, it might be advantageous to have a few scholarships to help everybody out.

But the kick in the face part is that this letter, that first "Get to know us!" letter from an institute of higher learning, came from MY ALMA MATER! Yes, the place where I misspent my college years seems interested in having my son follow in my footsteps and attend their school. I've already told him that won’t happen – mostly because I don't want him finding any remnants of my time on campus that might tarnish his glowing admiration of me. Assuming he glowingly admires me. The letter also makes me question the value of a degree from an institution that would have my son as a student, after my less than spectacular tenure there. But that’s another story.

It seems like the days of being challenged by changing diapers and teething pains were only weeks ago. As I look forward to the adventures that lie ahead as the father of three teenagers, I sort of wish I still had diapers to change. Dealing with those types of messes might be easier than dealing with the challenges ahead.

Four More Years Or FORTY More Years?

This is a post adapted from one of my Daddy Diaries blog posts for tesh.com

This is not a political rant.  We don’t do political rants on Tesh.com.  But it does have to do with politics, and it’s something that’s been on my mind as a Dad. 

The election is over.  The ads are off the air.  The robocalls have stopped.  The hate has (sort of) begun to recede.  It doesn’t matter who you voted for, I hope you voted.  If your people won, good for you.  If they lost, I’m sorry.  If you didn’t vote, you missed your chance to do something that could have made a difference, and that’s a shame.

We all have a challenge ahead of us as parents now that the election is over and we can concentrate on our lives and families.  Think of OUR parents, whether they were from the World War II era or the Vietnam era.  They all worked hard, often for the same company most of their adult life, to make sure WE had a better life than they did.  They knew the world could be better and tried their best to make it that way, not always for them, but always for us, their children. 

Despite their best intentions and hard work, the world may not be better for their children, otise known as US, than they would have wanted it to be.  It’s not their fault, it’s not our fault, there’s no time to be pointing fingers to whose fault it is.  As someone I used to work with often said, “it is what it is”. 

Every generation has wanted the next generation to have a better life than theirs.  I don’t hear people of my generation talking about that very often, often because we’re trying to figure out how to make our own lives better and not thinking about our children.  It’s a new world in a million different ways, ways our parents could have never predicted.  It’s not simple, it’s not perfect, but it is what it is.  And it’s the world our kids are growing up in, the world we’re supposed to be making better for them.

So we’re finished with all the partisanship and electioneering for four more years.  What about the next forty years?  Or the next eighty years?  What are you doing to make sure the world that our kids inherit from us is better than the world we live in right now?  Stop and think about it.  I’m guessing you can do more.  Let me know how you’re going to make the world better for your children, and THEIR children, in the comments below.